Reports: MSSU found new football coach, but thinks twice

The Watch has heard from totally unreliable sources that enjoy sarcasm and hitting below the belt that the search committee for Missouri Southern’s new football coach found a guy.
Jerry Sandusky.
The contract offer was withdrawn, however, after The Fart discovered he was involved in what the administration termed “minor legal difficulties” in Pennsylvania.
In a meeting with the administration, University Relations and Marketing, the search committee and Michael Beatty, the paper’s editors warned off the President’s Council and ran the university press release.
Requests for phone records from the search committee to 1-800-REALITY are pending.

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