Bored Watch for January

Some observations from the first 2011 Southernwatch Watch Party of the Bored of the Governors from our temporary world headquarters in metropolitan Seneca. So you know it will be balls out:

  • It’s been decades since a Miss America was shown publicly servicing someone (God bless you, Vanessa). Until now. Boy did Snodgrass smooch the presidential heiny. Snodgrasskisser.
  • Rob Yust deftly dodged Hot Rod Anderson’s question about paying for Body Bag Bruce’s (B3) meat market. He put all that on Mark “Rainmaker” Parsons. Parsons better get a monsoon real monsoon or he will be a fall guy.
  • And speaking of the improvements to the Ummell flood plain and asbestos garden (Naming rights available), did the VPAA just say “appropriate agencies” could shut down some of the classes we teach in Reynolds (Naming rights available) Hall? Are we in violation of safety codes or something? WTF.
  • Hey, Hilgendorf. When you are through tossing the Bored’s collective salad, realize staff isn’t getting more time off over spring break. It is getting an altered schedule.
  • O.K., is it just us or does it seem screwy that during the most pivitol budget year in state history, we are tying up $5 million to make $40,000?
  • The Bored is going all out on shared governance. Holy fuck. Let’s just leave its statement aside. They want an open discussion of why the satisfaction survey numbers don’t shine on the administration of Bruce Speck. So let’s have Bruce Speck arrange that agenda item at our retreat. Let’s hear it for open discussion and debate!
  • The silver fox in the henhouse gave us some information about the early retirement folks. He thanked the Bored for their “investment” in this. We still ask when in God’s green acre the body voted on this initiative. That “personnel” shit doesn’t hold water, either. That is not for blanket initiatives, but to protect negotiations and management of individuals. This administration and Bored is sneaky.

We are taking a betting pool on how many Bored members’ seats expire before the governor actually reappoints, replaces or otherwise takes action. Anderson’s seat has expired, Charles McGinty’s has expired and Mighty Dwight and David Jones are on the clock: August 2011. Next fall, that would be half the Bored.

We hope that our Champagne Room at Pat’s Lounge is ready next month so we can resume our usual routine of tipping strippers and watching people sell their souls for attention and cheap baubles.

You can decide which is which.

 

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